I am not happy at all today, but I can't speak out the reason. I alway say "人生不如意事十之八九"，from which I can get some comfort, but it did not work this time.
I indeed need to think about something, which I am always too lazy to think, I tried to change something, but just as somebody has ever said to me "I feel very sorry about this, but this is it, I can not chang it", so how thirsty I am now that I can change something. Most time, life is good, but not always.
But it indeed is it, nobody can change it. I felt very very bad, but I don't want to let him feel bad too, at least he is a such nice guy, has the most charming personality I have ever seen. I had been thinking all the time during the dinner, thinking about the balance, and finally I told him that I aggreed what he said after we walked out the cute, warm, nice steak restaurant. However I aslo told him that the reasons, actually there are two reasons that I finally decided to take it, and also they were ineed my true thought, for the first reason, I can't bear seeing his unhappness from his face, that could be more painful than I feel bad myself. for the second reason, I still have hope and dream here, though I felt diappointed, I'd like to give all of us a chance.
It's memorable today, just like the unforgetable day one year before in the cafe.
Well, though I still feel very very bad now, I have to calm down, let's see the new year and have the decision.
Jingle
2007/07/19
posted on 2007-07-19 22:43
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